Previews// Canis Canem Edit (PS2)

Put simply, fighting is limited to two buttons. Square will make you attack, and is context sensitive – if you’re facing a bully, you’ll start punching them, but if you manage to get them on the floor the same button will have Jimmy kick them in the ‘happy sacks’. Triangle is used for grabbing and throwing, and you can use a combination of those two buttons to perform various fighting manoeuvres. It’s very simple to get the hang of, and very satisfying to be rugby tackling nasty kids to the ground, punching their face in wrestling style, then picking them up and launching them sideways.

At this juncture, if it wasn’t at all clear for players beforehand, it was certainly made obvious now that Canis Canem Edit is a very light-hearted look at school life, seen at a ‘larger than life’ scale. There’s no blood in this game – enemies don’t gain physical damage and nobody dies in Bullworth. What you do get to do, however, is humiliate them. Each bully or enemy has a health meter underneath their model, signified by a circle and a coloured bar within it. Once their energy is low, you can head towards them and press Circle to deal the ultimate blow. It can range from giving the loser a Chinese Burn to grabbing their hand and making them hit themselves in the face with it. It’s a very comedic style that serves to bring the funny side of your childhood into the spotlight. And in true Rockstar fashion, it’s presented in the same hyper-real approach that has resulted in Grand Theft Auto being lambasted in the mainstream press for so long.

A teacher breaks up the scuffle and, as only a purely oblivious teacher can, has a go at Jimmy for not being in uniform. Never mind the fact that about ten kids were on him at once, eh? Before the game continues, we are introduced to a chap called Gary – a kid that looks like a cross between a preppy kid and a bully himself. He befriends you, but doesn’t beat around the bush about his desires to take over the school and humiliate all the other cliques in Bullworth. After visiting the boy’s Common Room (featuring a soda machine to restore health, a TV and a noticeboard amongst other amusements) Jimmy heads to his room to change into uniform.

Although at the beginning of the game we only have the basic Bullworth sweater to choose from, later in the game players will be able to find and buy new items of clothing and can even customise how they want Jimmy to look. As we take a tour around his rather run-down pad, Hugh details the timeline structure. “Each day will have a structure to it, such as lesson times and curfew and each night you’ll need to come to bed to sleep… if you leave Jimmy awake beyond two or three in the morning he’ll pass out. You’ll be able to break the school’s curfew and head outside at night but there’ll be consequences for things like that if you’re caught”.

It’s just like being at a real boarding school, except without the buggery. We’re kinda nervous. One of the first missions we get to see in action takes place a little while ahead of the first chapter, and has Jimmy attempting to rescue a nerd as he gets ambushed by bullies. After the cut scene, you have to leg it past the courtyard around the school (which is quite a distance in itself) to reach Bucky before his life is drained. There are more instances of the combat system here, and we’re told that as the game progresses you’ll be able to learn more fighting moves and combos to perform.

We also see weapons for the first time, but instead of guns or knives we get balls, slingshots, stink bombs and cricket bats to satisfy our desire for administering a beating. Completing each mission sometimes gets you a new item to use, but it will always affect how different cliques in the school view you. In saving Bucky, our Nerd Respect shot up but as a countermeasure our Bully Respect went six feet underground. It’s this kind of balance between the different cliques that makes the game really dynamic and it could also affect how you play as well.